|[AIDS/HIV] [Skin Care][Cosmetic Surgery]|
[Sexual Discrimination in Korea]
How To Talk With a Partner About Smart SexSex is too serious a matter to be left entirely to your genitals.The consequences can be quite serious, unless you think about your goals and priorities; what your're willing to do, andnot willing to do.
But lots of people aren't doing what they know they shouldbecause they are uncomfortable talking about their decisions.They're too embarrassed to bring up the subject; they fear rejection;or they just aren't sure how to say what they want to say.It's a lot easier to have sex than to talk about it,but talking and planning ahead can make sex much better.
Remember, you should only have sex when you want to; only with thoseyou want to be sexual with, and only in ways that are enjoyable and assafe as possible.
These mulaw (.au) audio files give examples of how you might want toapproach the subject of safer sex. These examples can help you getused to how it sounds, especially if you're uncomfortable talkingabout it.
Introducing the subject
Ask a question
Reassure your partner
If you have no supplies at hand
If you haven't talked about it yet
If your partner objectsYour partner might object to having safer sex; here's what you mightwant to say in response.
- People like us don't get AIDS [67K]
- I just don't want to worry about it, and I'm not just going to give up sex. I know of a lot of things we can do. [249K]
- You don't have to worry about me; I took an AIDS test last month! Yeah? [252K]
- All this talking about it gets in the way for me. Once I know that I don't have to worry about consequences, then I feel free to enjoy myself. [224K]
- You just don't want to have sex with me. I like sex, but I don't want to die for it. [106K]
- I guess I just don't turn you on? I just want for us to be friends before we're lovers, ok? [340K]
- Don't worry if your erection goes down... [48K]
- We don't have to use these forever [80K]
- I don't have AIDS; I'm not gay; I don't shoot drugs But anyone can get AIDS. The only way that I can feel safe is to use a condom. [223K]
- It's like taking a shower in a raincoat! I'll put it on you in my own special way -- you're going to like that part. [286K]
- I can't believe you're so uptight! AIDS is media hype! I want you, but I'm just not willing to take the chance. [235K]
- I don't want to have to plan my sex. But look, I've bought a whole bunch of condoms! Which one do you want to use first? [267K]
- I don't believe in rubbers. I don't want to get AIDS, and I don't want to get pregnant. [124K]
- I thought we were having a great time? Anyone I go to bed with has to care about me, and using protection is a way of showing that. [497K]
- It doesn't feel right having that thing between us. I'd love to be inside you with nothing between us, but how about we try it with the condom, and see what it's like? [178K]
- I don't want to stop now. Can't you just pull out this time? I want to do it as much as you do, but I just can't be inside you without protection. Pulling out won't help. [188K]
- We're attracted to each other; we're not kids; why not get on with it? It's too soon for me. [278K]
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